Skaters in the News:

Mr. Potato Head Goes on Diet, Takes up Inline Skating

Tuber Makes Transition From Couch Potato to Sports Spud!

By Robert "Just the Factoids" Burnson

Healthy Mr. Potato HeadMr. Potato Head will be flaunting his buff new physique at today's Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.

He'll be easy to spot. Just look for a towering tuber pumping his biceps like Arnold Schwarzenegger.

For the parade, he'll be wearing his running shoes and carrying a water bottle. But did you know that the newly svelte spud has also taken up inline skating?

It's true. His handlers at the U.S. Potato Board decided it was time for the paunchy potato, who was battered during the low-carb craze, to embrace a healthy lifestyle.

They put him on a diet and transformed him into a spud stud, complete with bulging biceps, inline skates, running shoes, a water bottle, baseball cap and portable MP3 player.

"We're thrilled to have such a terrific tuber encouraging Americans to stay active and eat nutritiously," said Ray Meiggs, president of the Potato Board.

This is not the first time the board has reconstituted Mr. Potato Head.

In 1987, it forced him to give up his cherished pipe when he became the "spokespud" for the Great American Smokeout.

In earlier years, the board forced him to give up French Fries, saying it smacked of cannibalism.


(Want your own Healthy Mr. Potato Head? Send your name and address, two UPC codes from fresh potato products and a check or money order for $7.50 to Healthy Mr. Potato Head, P.O. Box 461614, Aurora, CO 80046-1614. Make the check payable to 24/7 Incentives, Inc. Allow eight weeks for delivery.)

(Posted on Nov. 24, 2005)

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Copyright © 2005 by Robert Burnson

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